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Best "Snow/Winter Moments"

Sports & Outdoors Posted by zamoose 9 months ago

It's that time of year again -- the time where I regale my kids with stories of various exploits in winters gone by. Old favorites include:

  • how it snowed over 36" during that one storm when I was 6 or
  • when Uncle Bryce and I used to play Hijack The Sled Train on the L-shaped sledding hill (4-6 kids would each grab the sled ahead of them, comprising the Train and go down the longer, less steep side of the L, while 1-2 dedicated Bandits would speed down the short, steep side of the L and attempt to dislodge as many Train Cars [sleds] as possible from the train, either via ramming or ejecting from their own sleds and engaging in hand-to-hand combat with the Train denizens) or
  • when it snowed over 2 feet and Mr. Brad and Mr. Andy and I went out to the rock quarry that some local fiend had installed a tire swing over and took turns swinging out over the quarry full of snow, a good 25 feet above the pit bottom and Brad yelled "Let go!" when Andy was at the apex of a swing out and for some reason Andy did and he hung there, like Wile E. Coyote for what seemed like an eternity before gravity took over and he hit the snow below, spread-eagled, and there was a small "poof!" of snow that shot skyward and once we were certain Andy wasn't dead, Brad and I fell to laughing our faces off or
  • when Mr. Brad and Mr. Andy and I built a ramp over some trash cans during the blizzard of '96 and proceeded to use ski poles and an inflatable sled to launch Andy dozens of feet into soft snow and then Andy's brother asked to participate and we reminded him over and over and over about how he had to let go of the ski poles before he hit the end of the ramp and he swore he would remember and of course he didn't and he hit the end of the poles like the dog in a Foghorn Leghorn cartoon and plunged head-first into the pile of snow on the far side of the ramp and sunk up to his shoulders but couldn't fall over because the ramp was propping him up and so his feet just flailed around in the air uselessly and Brad and I couldn't breathe from laughing so hard and his muffled cries for help fell on ears rendered senseless from giggling.

You know, those sorts of stories, all of them delivered in a single breath (as hopefully rendered above).

So what are your best snow/winter stories?

12 replies

  • glen

    Zamoose, this is a fantastic thread.

    One winter we received about 3/4 of an inch of solid ice. And this wasn't ice, mixed with snow or anything like that... it was slick like an icicle. We lived on a cul-de-sac on a hill, and thought it would be a great idea to go sledding. After what seemed like an eternity walking up the hill, my brother got on the sled and set off down the hill, resembling this scene from a famous movie:

    Towards the bottom a car was parked on the street, and because you couldn't a) steer or b) stop, the sled naturally went straight for the rear of the car. My brother managed to catch the bumper while the rest of the sled flew under the car and down the hill.

    It was possibly the funniest thing I'd seen to that point; my brother underneath this car, only his head and arms visible holding on to the bumper.

    Reply

    • zamoose

      That's fantastic!

      During the Christmas break of '92-'93, we got a foot of snow, followed by an inch of rain and then freezing temperatures overnight, so it was basically an impenetrable 1" coat of ice over top of said foot of snow. I was throwing papers at the time (back when that wasn't considered abuse of a minor) and had no shot at getting my bike out, but the paper's trucks had somehow made the drop of all my papers during the night, so I bagged every paper (bags were expensive and paid for out of my pocket!) and put my courier bags in a plastic sled. Then I walked my route and was able to porch everyone's paper from the curb. The ice crust formed a perfect surface for skidding bagged papers across and most folks' front shrubs + the ice made ramps that were trivial to scoot a paper up and over.

      I was never able to replicate the feat again and the entire route only received porched papers a few more times (after I got my license and started doing it as a motor route) during torrential downpours.

      It was awesome.

      Reply

      • glen

        Hah, that would be a lot of fun for a kid, almost like a game. "How can I skid this thing to land on Mr. Smith's porch, while dodging the light post and the rose bush?".

        Reply

  • elancaster65

    I was a Youth Pastor in the 90's. We lived near Mt. Shasta and we took the kids to ski at the ski park. As a joke, I said with a wide grin, "Have fun. I'm here to ski. If you get hurt, don't page me off the mountain"

    An hour later, sitting in the lodge, I hear, "Will Eric L. come to the infirmary?"

    I felt like crap.

    There sat one of my teens, her ankle swollen and wrapped. She looked up and said, "I told them not to page you!!" She was near tears. I never felt so stupid and low in my whole life. I placated her and we got her home.

    Flash forward a decade later and I run in to her Dad at the church I was attending at the time. We chit-chatted and he mentioned the aforementioned story. I, still totally embarrassed, apologized profusely for any distress I cause his daughter and his family.

    He laughed and said his daughter brings it up all the time as one of her favorite stories of high school and youth group at that church. That made me feel a little better.

    I've learned to curb my sarcasm somewhat in the last 20 years. That was a good lesson for me. To this day, Dawn does not hold a grudge and for that I'm thankful!

    Reply

    • glen

      Wow, what a jerk! :-)

      It's always interesting what kids remember and retell as their favorite stories. Interestingly, the only time I've gone to a ski park with a youth group as an adult, someone busted their ankle.

      Reply

      • elancaster65

        We had one girl go snow-blind for a day at Mt. Bachelor in Oregon. She didn't want to wear her sunglasses as she thought they looked cooler on her head above her head band.

        She learned the hard way as well.

        Reply

  • Chet_Manly

    This is awesome. There is an art to telling a good stories. You gentlemen have this skill developed well.

    I love the crazy stories, but I grew up in Florida. Sad Trombone Sound Effect My winter story is that I had to put on shorts and a shirt to go out and ride the bike I got for Christmas. Perhaps because of this, I really get a kick out of these types of crazy stories.

    Reply

    • glen

      What?? No crocodiles? Surely there was a crocodile chasing you.

      Reply

      • Chet_Manly

        Silly people from Kansas, in Florida it's alligators, not crocodiles...but none at Christmas time....though I like where your mind is at. Here is some footage of one of my totally normal swimming lessons: Ace Ventura When Nature Calls: Ace vs Alligator

        Reply

        • Chet_Manly

          Pretend the text link isn't there. It's supposed to be a video link like you did with the sledding link (which was awesome). But it's Christmas Eve, and I'm tired, so I'm not going to spend the effort right now to figure out how to link it properly. Please forgive my laziness.

          Reply