So you've found yourself in the clink and you're needing to get into contact with the outside world. No problem! Enter the Beat the Boss phone, the smallest phone ever built.
This burner was specifically engineered to be untraceable in many scenarios if it were, say, inside your body. The phone is fully functional and about the same size as a AA battery.
Yes, this is an actual product.
Now you no longer have to bribe family members to bake a cake with a file inside on your visits.