Today I want to talk about something that most of our parent didn't have to deal with..... The easy access to porn.
I want to start this thread by mentioning that I am 49-years-old now. I was married for 20-years, but my first wife and I never had any children. I recently got remarried (last August) to a wonderful lady who has 1 son. She and I have been together almost 4-years now, and he really looks up to me. He likes to mimic the things I do, my style of clothing, and the stuff I enjoy.
With that being said, my 12-year-old stepson is now going through puberty. He's getting taller, developing some acne, and dealing with all those goofy changes.
This morning I was getting ready to leave for work and his cellphone alarm started going off. It was barely after 5 am yet his mom doesn't wake him up for school until 6 am, so she tiptoed into his room to turn off the alarm. When she opened his phone to shut off the alarm she was greeted by the photo of a naked lady. Apparently he had been looking at nude women last night and didn't shut down Google when he was done. His mom closed Google by hitting the back button, which scrolled through several more pages of nude ladies before it closed out Google completely.
The boy didn't wake up during any of this, so he doesn't know what his mom has discovered.
How would you guys deal with this?
I told his mom that I would deal with it, and to not mention anything to him. I don't want him feeling shamed. I plan to tell him that I am the one that shut his alarm off while he slept, and that I saw the pictures on his phone. I plan to tell him that looking at those types of photos is okay, but at the same time it is not good to objectify women.
His mother and I don't want him to have an unhealthy obsession with naked women.
I want to approach this subject gracefully without making him feel like he has done something wrong. I remember when I was his age. I had magazines hidden in my room, and I turned out okay. Of course, I didn't have the pornographic cornucopia that is the internet in my greedy little hands when I was his age either.
My stepson has a very close relationship with his mom, so I don't believe he will have an issue objectifying women. All I can do is try my best to explain this stuff to him.
So what do you guys think? I would love to hear from some fathers in this group that may have gone through similar situations with their sons. Or just some general advice from any of you guys. We are all dudes here. We've been through puberty. How do you guys feel I should approach this?
His mom was shocked, but she is not mad at him. She's mostly worried about him having an unhealthy fixation with nude women, and, ironically, she wants me to point out to him that those ladies are not "real", in the sense that most women are not super petite and have breasts the size of ripe watermelons.
On a closing note ....and this might not be very "politically correct", but I am happy to now know that he is straight.